Excuses

 

I CAN'T RIDE BECAUSE ....

Over the years the times have changed. When the Moorhouse Marauders first started back in 1994 there was no such thing as a reason not to ride - you rode. When it rained, you simply got wet.

Then the excuses started - it's raining - it's blowing a gale - it's freezing cold - 39° is just too hot - I'm sick in bed. As the years passed the excuses got a bit more lame - it's forecast to rain - looks like being too windy in the morning - they say it'll only be 6° in the morning ....

Nowadays, though, there's always a few turning up to breakfast on Friday mornings in civvies (or not turning up at all) - usually with a pretty weak excuse as to why they didn't get the bike out. The Excuse Committee noticed that some of these stories are becoming a bit more imaginative and should be recorded for posterity, so here are some of the most recent ones.

 

  * I simply couldn't bring myself to ride this morning because I am still far too distressed by last Saturday's election result. Mike Sabey - May 2019
  * I won't be riding in the morning due to my impecunious circumstances - I'll actually have to work Greg Tilley - June 2017
  * I didn't ride this morning because our house is for sale and I couldn't find my riding clothes Greg Tilley - May 2017
  *

I can't ride in the morning because I'm staying in Williamstown at the moment looking after the grandchildren. The punt doesn't start until 6.30, so to get there I'd have to ... ride my bike

Mike Kermode - January 2017
 
*

Having been told he wouldn't be able to use the 7° Rule as it was in fact over 9°, he came up with this gem:
I used the Couldn't-be-Bothered Rule!

 Greg Tilley - June 2016
 
*
 I didn't ride at Camberwell today because it was foggy at Tullamarine yesterday Buzz Borsitzky - June 2016
 
*
 I didn't ride this morning because I hadn't pumped up my tyres Greg Tilley - April 2016
 
*
 I won't be riding in the morning because I'm having dinner with an old mate and I know that I'll get too pissed and won't be able to get up early enough to ride .... but I'll be able to get there for breakfast though. Greg Tilley - March 2016
 
*
 I didn't ride this morning because:
I'm suffering very bad jet lag. I arrived home at 8pm Sunday night, and for the last 3 nights went to bed at about 9:30-10, and like clockwork, wake at 1:30am-and then stay awake!!! Last night I finally fell asleep at about 4:30, and before doing so, decided to reset my alarm for 8:30-and it woke me up!! (webmaster's note: waking up at 1.30am? That's 2.30 in the afternoon in Paris, why would you wake up then? Perhaps you weren't in Paris after all .......???) 		Greg Tilley - March 2016
 
*
 I didn't ride because there was rain on the radar 300km away. And besides, now that I'm getting older I've lost my mojo Buzz Borsitzky - January 2016
 
*
 I didn't ride because I thought it might rain so I decided to go to the gym instead .... but actually I didn't get to the gym Buzz Borsitzky - January 2016
 
*
 I couldn't ride this morning because it was too dark (webmaster's note: too dark? .... really? .... in the middle of January?) Ross Kilborn - January 2016
 
*
 I can't ride because I have to pick up a van, collect 20 Fraxinus Griffithii and go to farm and plant them. Greg Tilley - January 2016
 
*
 I can't ride at 6am because I have an appointment at 10am for a haircut Greg Tilley - November 2015
 
*
 My bike's in the shed gathering dust, and that's where it's gonna stay - because I'm shit scared of falling off yet again Chris Yeoman - 2015
 
*
 I can't ride because I've broken my collar bone and eight ribs. I'll be there next week, though Ross Foster - March 2015
 
*
 I can't ride because I have to get the dog to the groomer so he looks beautiful when I take him to mum's nursing home later in the day Greg Tilley - October 2015
 
*
 I can't ride because I've got the crud Ross Foster - 2015 (also 2014, 2013, 2012. 2011, 2010, 2009, 2008, 2007, 2006 .... )